Thursday, June 26, 2003 :: 10:49:00 PM

Song of choice: You Shook Me All Night Long - ACDC

Are you ready for a near-orgasmic couple of paragraphs????

The Rolling Stones
ACDC
The Guess Who (BTO)
AND
THE BLUES BROTHERS

OH MY @#&%(# GOD......

In case you live under a rock somewhere, or just dont have access to any form of media or public opinion/news, ALL of these groups (with a few others) are going to be performing at Downsview Park on July 30th, and on top of that, The Blues Brothers - that's right JAKE and ELWOOD BLUES - are going to be hosting it!!!! Dan Aykroyd and Jim Belushi!!!!!! Unfortunately the original Jake, John Belushi, will not be performing because, well, he's dead. So his brother, Jim, will be taking his place!

I've been havin' a friggin' FIT ever since I heard about this concert.. I mean, when I thought it was JUST going to be The Stones, I thought "yea!!" but when I heard about the lineup of other talent coming during Tuesdays Press Conference, my "yea!!" turned into a "HELL YEA, MOTHA F----!!!"

You have no idea how excited I am about this.. Sure, I was excited about the Concert for Toronto. It was a GREAT show!!!

But I have to admit, I'm a Rock and Roll guy at heart - Especially 80s rock! I mean, frig! ACDC was the ONLY CD I had in the car for like 6 months last year! it's STILL there!

*heavy breathing*

oh yea, I should mention.. Justin Timberlake is among those performing... meh, I'd go listen to Britney Spears on the same stage if it meant I got to hear ACDC, The Stones, The Guess Who, and The Blues Brothers!

Hell, I'd watch Grandma sit and do a crossword for 2 hrs on stage!!

omfg...

it's scheduled to be a 9+ hour concert... BUT it's in a FRIGGIN PARK - NOT a building venue - which means IT COULD GO ALL FRIGGIN NIGHT!!

they might just shake us all night long!!

*sigh*
*deep breath*

ok ok... my high is starting to............

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

sry.. now it's out of my system... I'm starting to come down from my high now..

ok..

inserting horizontal line here..

---

OK! so what have I been up to...
The last few days have held a remarkable turn around for me personally. I've come to terms with some things that I really needed to come to terms with, and I thank the person that made it so easy for me.

I also came to another really big conclusion this week, but that will have to wait until another post.. it isn't the time yet =P

anyway, all in all, I'm feeling really good... the smiles have returned to me... and I'm talking about the ones on the inside, not just the outside. =)

enough of that..

Work is keeping me busier than ever... I'm out on the job site all day now, which is starting to cook me up to a nice cherry red, but that's alright... I'm not hurtin' yet... so I'm not burned badly yet..

yes, I said yet..

I cost our company a few thousand dollars the other day.. and get this - nobody cares!
that gives you an idea on just how much it costs to build a road.

here's the deal - I'm only supposed to collect tickets from trucks coming in dropping material for the ROAD...
after, we review the tickets, find out how many loads and Tonnes there were.. that's how we find out how much to bill the contractor.
but I collected a bunch of tickets from trucks that were on the same job, but weren't working on the road, they were doing SEWERS...
I didn't know they were separate.... and the sewers are already paid for, there is no need for us to have the tickets.
but we do.. a few anyway, I got the majority of them cancelled...
so we gotta pay for the loads going to the sewers that were already paid for...

I got told today from one of our guys: "dont worry, we're not building a piano here. I fucked up once, but it was a mistake."
that was from Clive. 'nuff said.

anyway, this was just meant to be a short lil update.. so there u go.
ooo.. I like what blogger has done with itself... very slick.
for those of u who dont use blogger.com, I really dont understand why...

anyway....

Until next time.......
*fade to black*

:: Eldorado ::

Monday, June 23, 2003 ::

Song of choice: If I Had a Million Dollars - Barenaked Ladies

Wow... well here I am, 2 days after the big Concert for Toronto, and my ears have just finally healed back to their usual level off goodness.. and all I've gotta say is...

DAMN

not damn as in "AWWWWWW DAMN!", but damn as in "DAMN, GINA!"

the show was awesome... absolutely awesome.

The show took place at Skydome and the Air Canada Centre. Huge video screens linked the venues together, and performances at each venue alternated, allowing both crowds to catch the acts down the street on a live, giant-screen feed while the stage is set up for the next act.

It seemed that when the ACC groups were playing, though, that the majority of the Skydomers thought that it would be a great time to hit the food and 'money grabber' stands.. ($35 for an Avril Lavigne tshirt? PUHlease... robbie, how about I get you a glowing avril dog that walks uphill (or was it downhill) for your birthday?)

a lot of stuff could have stood to be booted - ie. swollen members...

I could have handled a little less avril... she did 7 songs, including her 4 singles...

BNL was ***FRIGGIN FANTASTIC***... of course I LOVE them to begin with, so they could have stood up there for a half hour scratching themselves and dancing to polka music and I still would have loved it just as much. They opened with My Appartment, then followed with (in no particular order) Pinch Me, One Week, Brian Wilson, an impromptu freestyle solo which that turned into the Chicken Dance, if you've seen them on TV in concert before, you know what I'm talking about... the freestyle consisted of a nice little SARS cheerleader cheer (gimmie an S, gimmie an A, gimmie an R, gimmie an S... what do you have? SARS!)... they jammed for a while and had white face masks put on... all great fun... and ended with If I Had a Million Dollars... Absolutely great.

Sarah McLachlan... even after making her thoughts on the media's dealings with SARS ("they fucking piss me off because toronto is such a beautiful city") clear, she was incredible. Absolutely incredible. That's musical talent and desire right there. She loves doing what she's doing, she has the most beautiful voice, and is actually quite diverse in what she CAN sing... I admire that, and think she hasn't really gotten the recognition that she deserves. Not yet, anyway, considering her last performance was at Lillith Fair in 1999, that's understandable. She was the headliner for the ACC show, and for a good reason. Singing classics like I Will Remember You, Innocent, a few songs off of her new ablum set to hit stores in September, and encored with an almost haunting rendition of Angel.

The Hip was good... put on a good show, but the sound was horrible.. the band was almost eardrum numbingly loud, and you could hardly hear the words to the songs, which is too bad because they're pretty well known for their clarity... but all in all they were a good show, playing classics like my fav: Poets. they closed.

so yea, it was a great show, something I'd like to go see again if similar groups got together again.

This is the summer for concerts, I tell ya.. and it doesn't stop with these names.. With groups such as The Rolling Stones coming to town at the end of July and, get this, U2 might be coming to town!!!!!!!!! it cant get much better than that!

The Stones' concert is going to cost somewhere in the area of $20/person... but that will be announced tomorrow for sure. there's talk that it might even be a FREE concert...

but I would assume that U2 would cost big bucks...

anyway, that's all I have for now... I took pictures of the event, but they didn't turn out that well, so I'm not gonna bother posting them right away =(

Until next time.......
*Fade to Black*

note: just to clarify - the story of U2 coming to town was just that, a story. they are NOT coming to town, as far as I know, any time soon.

:: Eldorado ::

Tuesday, June 17, 2003 ::

Song of choice: Life is a Highway - Tom Cochrane

It's another Monday... it's another start to a boring-ass week...

Fido still hasn't called me back, those punks... I'm gonna call back and raise a lil hell...

What mood am I in tonite? I believe "blah" will describe it quite nicely, but lets recap the last few days shall we?

I went down to that pet shop behind the office last friday where I was introduced to a girl - Paula. She's a relatively successful young actress, and seemed like a really nice girl - one who was genuinely happy with what she was doing, and I admire that. She (like her mother) has this really deep love for animals. I really wished she lived closer to here, she seems like a great person to get to know...

...or at least I thought so until she showed me a picture of a pump-action 9mm (i believe) rifle coloured in charcoal/white fatigues... Then she assured me that it would ONLY be used for target practice..... I believed her. lol

Anyway, that was my friday afternoon that I didn't mention in my last post...

Sunday? oh well - Sunday... only two words can explain Sunday - Budgie Beats!!!!!!
that's right, I've finished the long anticipated infomercial I was making for my uncle to get his male and female budgies "bumpin' "... we shall now see if it works..
it was great. I did the whole thing in Flash, and it looked exactly like those "2 CD or 2 Cassettes - call now!" commercials u see on TV all the time. I may post it on my website (www.omegavoid.vze.com) if I can compress it to a suitable size..)
Featured artists: Barry White, Marvin Gaye, and Hot Chocolate......... one word: beautiful.

--------

It is now some time later... my mood is still blah.. I need something, and something SOON, to come down and swoop in to pick me back up again. I'm happy on the outside, but there are bits and pieces of me on the inside that are just falling... falling into nothingness... a black that is so baron that not even sound exists within it. Is this to be my life? I'm not there yet, but I fear for the worst. You know those little infamous "what if" questions that jessica was floating around her blog (www.love_indifference_hate.blogspot.com) a while ago that I told her would drive her batty if she thought about them? I'm (of course) now guilty of the same thing...

Oh how I thirst for the feeling of someone beneath my hand... the warmth of someone sitting close to me... the feeling of tension the first time you reach for their hand, the first time you kiss, the first time you admit your love for them... tension, anticipation, excitement, FEAR..... I miss it all.

---------

Alright, it's AGAIN some time later.. I'm sorry, I seem really distracted tonite because I am. I just got finished reading something I wasn't happy was written, and am starting to think that the "my blog, my rules" motif is, although applicable in all cases, should be respected in a much lighter sense. It may be "legally" acceptable, by this "my blog" rule to say what you want.. but does that entitle you to totally cast off all else? does that make it right?

I dont want to dwell on this tonite. I dont want to get into any "dangerous territory"... at least not this kind of "dangerous territory"...

Anyway all, I'm tired, frustrated, saddened, tired, defeated, achy, and tired....

*sigh* - why is it that the ones we love are often the ones that can hurt us the most, even if they're not trying to? I mean, it's not like I've been hurt by something someone said or did... but I'm hurt because of someone.. because someone close to me, someone I care very much about, is hurt... love, I wish for you to be well soon...

Here's to my someone.....

Until next time.......
*Fade to Black*

:: Eldorado ::

Saturday, June 14, 2003 ::

Song of choice: Pinch Me - Barenaked Ladies

A week or so ago I was really bummed that I didn't get tickets to The Concert For Toronto. Until a couple days ago I get a hold of Paul and he sells me 4 of them! it's a beautiful thing.
This is the reason for my song of choice today - Pinch Me...(side note: I originally wrote "Pinch Men"...Freud is dancing in his grave.) ANYway, it's going to be absolutely amazing. As of right now Robbie and Jessica are coming with me, but who shall get my last ticket? it really is so hard to decide who. I thought I had someone lined up, but decided against it. I'll come to a decision and let y'all know about it at a later date.. IT COULD BE YOU! =P

Jessica and I went to the edge of DownTown tonite and walked a good chunk along the LakeShore. We both have never been across that beautiful suspension bridge that goes over the channel on the south side of LakeShore Blvd (I'm sure u know the one I'm talking about) so we walked there.. only thing that would have made it even more perfect would be to remove the fog, and have some icecream =D

I'm gonna be heading down there for the fireworks shows coming up - who wants to go?!All of you can come, it's FREE! (just bring some snacks or something and we'll chow down to a good show!

I called Fido today and gave the poor little bastard on the other end of the phone shit. I totally backed the guy into a corner. Basically I said it was rediculous that I have to pay for incoming text messages, especially when I have no say over how many I receive!! If I had an option to read them or not, then great! but if you, for example, send me a text message - I pay for it!!!! (now, I get 100 messages a month and it just counts toward my total). My beef was that I wasn't told that it was 100 messages outgoing AND incoming.

In the words of Joe Pesci: "they FUCK YOU at the phone company!"

I bought a new XBox game the other day with my new-found wealth. SpyHunter - EASILY one of the BEST games I've played. This is the game that last year, when I went to visit my bro for the weekend, he rented a PS2 AND SpyHunter. We *LITERALLY* spent every waking moment playing it. Ohhhhhhhh the nostalgia of playing it was fantastic. For those of you who were around in the old C64 (Commodore 64), you'll remember it... it's the car shoot-em-up game.

I beat Halo a couple weeks ago, too! I'm on a roll! =D

I'm soooooooooooo tired but I dont wanna stop writing...

OH, I want to tell you about my dog saving event this week... i'll just paste my (slightly modified) msn messages into here..

it was just a little sidestreet off of the highway... I was driving along and looked in my mirror and she was prancing down the middle of the road... so I stopped the car.. she
stopped. so I started to go again, she continued.. I stopped, she stopped.. so I got out of my car and she came prancing up to me.... sniffed me a bit.. then sat down and started to whine and cry..I assumed she was lost, so I looked at her tags and called her owner.. they weren't home. she started to try to jump through my car window
(which there was no way.. she was a rather.. umm... robust border collie...) so I opened my back door and she jumped right in and stuck her head out of the window! I drove her to this place right behind the site office. it's a pet food/toy/supplies place.. they kept her on a leash until the owner came and picked her up.

anyway, more tomorrow - I cant keep my eyes open..

Until next time......
*Fade to Black*

:: Eldorado ::

Monday, June 09, 2003 ::

Song of choice: How Did I Fall in Love With You? - Backstreet Boys

Ok ok before you scold me for putting a Backstreet Boys song as my song of choice for this blog, PLEASE go download it.

Twice in one day? of course - sometimes 3 times ;)

as you can see from my picture of me on the right - I broke my glasses. =(

ok, let me clarify that - my brother broke them. He hit me in the face today when we were messin' around... I kept hittin him in the face with a $20 bill - brushing it around his face and everything, so when he tried to take it, he hit me. Snapped the arm right off. He finished what Christa started on NewYears eve. (she also hit me in the same spot and broke part of the arm, my brother broke the only other part holding it on).

Anyway, after that there is no other real point to this post. I've come to the point where I might stop writing in here. I mean, I do this for fun. I do it because I like to write and this is a place for me to exercise that part of me. But I often wonder who actually reads it, which is why I'm asking you to let me know... somehow... if you read this page at all. Make a comment on the individual post comment boards, or post in my general topic message board on the left. Your comments will be what drive me to write something, otherwise you'll be stuck having me update it once every week or two, especially now that I'm not here all day due to work and such.

Sorry for the short post - this post was just to tell u that my brother broke my glasses *grumpy face*.....

Until next time.......
*fade to black*

:: Eldorado ::

Sunday, June 08, 2003 ::

Song of choice: If I Didn't Have You - Amanda Marshall

Huh.. more than a week, and I really dont know what to write about. As far as my job goes, read my last post. Nothing has changed.

What's been going on with ME personally lately? To tell you the truth, I feel like I've been on an emotional roller coaster.

My mind is a deep and clouded ocean, and my heart is the beach. Both completely separate entities, but two things that need to depend on each other to exist.

When I go to a beach, I love spending most of my time just lounging out on the sand... digging massive holes and seeing just how creative I can be in what to do with these holes. But as far as my analogy goes, is it ok to spend most of my time on the beach, digging in the sand? Should I listen to my heart?

The truth is I would absolutely love to, however I'm in a position where my mind and my heart are both passing their ideas back and forth, never once sharing the same feeling. It's a game of tennis, and as of right now neither side has let the ball pass them.

I sit here tonight - blue jeans and black t-shirt (affectionately dubbed as my "gino shirt" by a certain BLONDE, whose name shall remain untyped) - in a mood which has plagued my very state of mind for at least the last couple of weeks. Please make it go away. Please make it stop. I dont want to stop what I'm feeling, but I want to at least be able to control it. Free will? I'm starting to think humans have no such thing. Or maybe we do, we just dont know how to deal with it. Or at least I dont. If you do, please share your secret with me.

Or maybe free will depends solely on actions, and not emotions? Does this make sense? If this is the case, we have free will - however it is limited. Limited to that which we have control over. In this sense, is it really free? Are we free to do as we wish? Or are we free to do as we can, within reason?

Another profound personal discovery I had of myself this weekend was the fact that I'm a blue triangle. Tell me, readers, please make my job easier and tell me what colour/shape you are. If you have no idea as to what I'm talking about, dont worry.

Anyway, inserting horizontal line here... I want to separate these two topics to avoid confusion.

---

Friday night was decidedly the night that Jess and I were going to see each other, and what a fantastic night it was. She probably doesn't think so, but even without the two stand-ins we were looking for to sit on my couch and work on a crossword puzzle with an Elton John DVD playing in the background while her and I sat and played GoFish, I still really enjoyed it.

We had my house to ourselves because my parents were already out of town, and at the last minute I got a call from my sister on my cell phone explaining that she was going up north with her Boyfriend. This was good because then we wouldn't have to fight for the TV with anyone. We ordered a pizza... ok, we ordered a couple pizzas (which, by the way, are totally gone now) and just had a nice night in. We ram shacked my movie collection and decided to watch Forest Gump. Half way through we walked down to the store (such a GORGEOUS night) to get something to drink. We talked about how we both got to know each other, and how our attitudes with each other haven't changed much over the last 3 years and 1 month that we've been actively talking. Her first message to me on icq, actually, was "DAMN! I accidentally hit authorize!. She just looked absolutely dumbfounded as we walked on how sarcastic our relationship was at that time. Especially with a person that she didn't know so well and who was slightly older. I laughed, and chalked it up to our immediate realization that there was a profound sense of chemistry between us.

I have to admit, the first time her and I went out alone together, I was extremely nervous. I dont know why, but I was. We went to Silver City to see Chicken Run. I drove there after one of my Driving lessons one day, and her mum drove her there to meet me. I remember sitting at one of the small round tables waiting for her to show up. Eventually I saw her climb out of her car, and walk up to the large double doors of the theater. I stood up and started to walk towards her but she didn't see me, so I scooted between the row of FastLane machines and came up behind her. I tapped her on the shoulder, and we went to buy our tickets.

After seeing the movie, we went for a walk. We walked all around the area, eventually stopping at Coffee Time Donuts to grab a drink. There, I believe she (or I) got a bagel - c'mon.. my memory isn't THAT good! And we just sat outside on one of their picnic tables and talked. So begins our verbal relationship. (note: I've been informed that it was HER who got the bagel =P)

We walked around until dusk, and found a bus shelter behind PriceClub, and it was there that she first told me about her uncle and his husband (which I'm still absolutely DYING to meet). My bus came, and went. I wasn’t going to leave her there alone! So we talked some more and she got in her bus when it arrived and went home. I was there for another 10 minutes or so before my bus arrived which didn't stop. It drove right on by me. I still remember the dirty look I gave the bus as I realized that it wasn't going to stop *scrunches up face*. So a half hour goes by and I get on my bus to go home, I get home, talk to my brother a bit and hear about his day golfing, and I go up to go to sleep.

And that was it! dont ask me why I wrote it. This entry started off with such a weird beginning with a rather questionable direction, and I ended up writing about how Jessica and I started talking.... But it's fitting. She has been such a source of emotional stability for me over the last 3+ years. She has always been my voice of reason and understanding. Even when I was faced with situations in which others sat and scrunched their nose up at, or thought I was absolutely out of my mind for even considering, she was there telling me that what I thought mattered, and if I wanted to do whatever it was I was thinking about at the time - if I thought it was right for ME - then I should do it. I thank you, Jessica, for being the one who taught me to dig holes in the sand, while soaking my feet in the water when it came to those things.

I'd like to write more, but I think that's a fitting conclusion.

huh.... is it a coinsidence that I finish writing this and I hear the first sounds of a thunderstorm outside?

Until next time......
*fade to black*

:: Eldorado ::